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RUBY LOVEDAYS DIARY
Please note that the views of Ms Loveday are not necessarily
the views of the website. Ms Loveday chooses to email us
anonymously and we respect her wishes.
You can’t stop progress, one can only imagine the
scenes of outrage and demonstration in 1782 as yet another
planning application went in to ‘yea old Rottingdean
district council’ another blot on the landscape, a
towering windmill. Those mercenary millers had a cheek -
turn your back for a minute and they had knocked up another
one without so much as a by your leave.
What I do express my concern over is frail old ladies manning
stalls on dusty streets. Canvassing for signatures and peddling
cut price jam and tomato plants to pay for legal action
(hope its not the infamous Rottingdean jam featured in Junes
diary)
Also I was shocked to see immaculately penned graffiti
plastered in 4 foot high white lettering proclaiming, ‘stop
the blot’ Mr. Loveday nearly got rammed up the backside
as he slowed down to read it on the final stretch of road
into Saltdean
As I said I'm one for progress I was most disappointed
to find out that the building works opposite st Dunstans
is simply work on the sewage pipes. I had so hoped it would
be a new Sainsbury’s.
I love the Grand Ocean Hotel , and I have stood by them
and fiercely protect them as I would a dear friend .I’m
sorry but I will not hear a bad word. Any hotel that is
as welcoming to local residents as they are, supplying generous
prizes to our pre-schools has my support
All I’m saying is if a inspector came to my house
unannounced and got on to her hands and knees and started
to poke about under my fridge I’m sure she would come
up with damming evidence to suggest the love day premises
was less than pristine. I think that is universally true.
Well, except for that woman my daughter has told me about
that lives in Oakland’s who bleaches her floors nightly
before bed.
The following poem by an unknown author is especially for
her and the lady health inspector
DUST IF YOU MUST:
Dust if you must, but wouldn’t it be better
To paint a picture? Write a letter?
Bake a cake? Plant a seed? ponder the difference between
want and need?
Dust if you must but there’s not much time,
With rivers to swim and mountains to climb
Music to hear and books to read
Friends to cherish, a life to lead.
Dust if you must, but the worlds out there
The sun in your eyes and the wind in your hair
A flurry of snow a shower of rain
This day will not come round again
Dust if you must, but bear in mind
Old age will come and it’s not kind
And when you go as go you must
You yourself will make more dust
Much love, Ruby see you at the (Rottingdean fair on Saturday)
The buzz word around Saltdean is ‘sustainability’
there are recycling points on every corner with some local
residents even proffering local community recycle bins on
there own front lawns
Well in the old days in Saltdean we did all that sort of
thing automatically we grew our own and shared out bread
and cakes when we did a big bake and we gave each other
cuttings . I'm glad to see the community spirit is still
with us. I'm not one myself for waste and do my bit for
recycling so when Mr. Loveday suggested a new shag pile
for the lounge off we went to carpet right in Newhaven for
a nice bit of roll end im always up for a bargain the thing
is I have not got used to metric yet so when the huge rolls
of carpet are on offer and all taped up I can't tell what
the dickens they are in length I got that nice man to cut
and unroll about 7 rolls before I saw the sign it said to
all fitters would you please discard your remnants in to
the skip in the yard behind oh I thought that would be recycling
so I thanked him for his help and got Mr. Loveday to drive
me up the rear well there were all sorts shag piles to axminster
I had a good poke round before choosing a nice length off
wool Berber I got back in the skoda and told Mr. Loveday
which one to drag out it was only a bit damp up one side
and the cat spay smell would go with a bit of vanish .The
man protested but he did get out of the car and had a couple
of runs at the ramp it was then he spotted our young man
the one that was so helpful in the shop he was having a
Coffee break he spotted Mr. Loveday day and was laughing
and waving Mr. Loveday came back to the car with out the
carpet, and said he was embarrassed. I ask you! some men
have got no guts about them now that would have been sustainability
Much love Ruby
I did feel sorry for the ex proprietor at the Rottingdean
tea rooms , my old friend June Whitfield did it in her TV
commercials in the 80s and now it seems the tea rooms have
been caught out! recently pleading guilty to ‘three
offences relating to jams and lemon curds’ ‘an
investigation by trading standards showed that products
were being described as ‘home made’ when in fact
they were not’ ,, oh love! I did feel for them .I have
never been caught out myself and Mr. Loveday has no idea.
So im taking this opportunity to come clean - I myself have
on occasion bought a large tin of catering sized marmalade.
Available infrequently from the discount shop in Peacehaven
(only slightly out of date ) I have decanted the thick cut
marmalade in to smaller jars, slapped a fancy Ruby label
on the front and finished with a paisley print mop cap effect
a la women’s institute. Not that I am suggesting that
any such fraudulent activity goes on at their Friday morning
get together I just love their work and regularly cast an
envious eye over the amazing cross-stitching and handy work
for sale I have often had to hold back when it comes to
taking home sets of coordinating toilet roll covers and
tea cozies. Amazing needle work ladies .Also the pies and
pastries kept warm on heat retaining pads are ‘to die
for’ ‘a moment on the lips, a life time on hips’
I could pass them of as being my own, especially with them
being kept warm. He wouldn’t know, but they never stay
in the bags long enough to get through the ‘Loveday
front door’ ‘.Its enough to make a dishonest women
of you!’
Much love Ruby
I'm just about sick of these so called boffins in Saltdean.
You can't move for them. I've attended 2 quiz nights in
Saltdean recently with the full expectation of a clean win
.Only to be bamboozled in to 4th and 5th place . im not
accusing any local dignitaries of cheating but Ruby does
have eagle eyes and I could see boffin over sized ears turning
toward the rubilites team table in expectation when a showbusiness
or soap opera questions was posed .The trouble is, there
are just too many doctors or professors of 'this that and
the other' knocking about Saltdean, and they are always
on the opposing team. Even with my weighty knowledge of
horticulture and local affairs my superb team ,'the rubelites'
didn't get a look in. And that first prize hamper looked
so appetizing. I like to support local events .As we all
do especially if its something for the kiddies. We are a
law unto are selves in Saltdean a 'world within a world'
if you like whilst the planet is 'going through a difficult
time' (for I shall not name it )and every where you look
is anti *** slogans our local graffiti relates heavily to
dogs muck, why only last week Mr Loveday and myself were
on the undercliff with the grandchildren and I counted 4
individual rabid chalkings of a dog poo hater. Well I ask
you ,there I was trying to work up an appetite for afternoon
lunch at the White Horse but I just kept imagining great
steaming piles of it, and I kept getting the whole party
to check the underside of shoes .Well we took the overland
route home and would you believe it, there it was again.
Some half soaped Saltdean boffin has decided to twin Rottingdean
with 'dodge city' the official sign was there hanging below
the tasteful portrait of the windmill and hills. I bet that
will turn up as a quiz question at the next fundraiser.
When we got back, it was stuck all around the back tyre
and spokes of my granddaughters bike, and her first trip
out without the stabilisers .....
you draw it to you, that's what I think.
See you all at the St Martins Easter Fayre on the 12th
(I have herd they are giving away cloth bags with every
purchase)
much love Ruby
dear all, my major concern is, will the asylum seekers
be privey to the daily nine o'clock bingo? and, will they
be able to enjoy the talent filled shows those super blue
coats put on?one must only think that winning 'a line' will
be the most exciting experience of a asylum seekers life
and seeing a live show - a saltdean 'feast for the eyes'.
Yours, Ruby
Mr Loveday and myself saw in the new year at the Ocean
Hotel with the help of a few local friends, a welcoming
place it has become. I have it on good authority from the
manager himself that all Saltdean residents of good behaviour
are most welcome (as long as we don't use their penny arcade
or take part in the nine o'clock bingo). I was pleased that
she was keen to quash some vicious rumours about us residents
being shunned which simply isn't true (I'm glad) because
Mr Loveday were sure we weren't allowed in to see their
nightly shows, and every time we ventured there, I was in
a different outfit and cat with no coat so they though we
were holidaying in one of their exquisite rooms. I did get
cold with only a cardi thrown over my shoulders and it was
all to no avail because most of the lovely blue coats or
red coats or whatever they are called, all know me by name
. Poor Mr Loveday - he has no idea of the level of my celebrity.
So talking of the Ocean, they have been having a huge vermin
problem of late, pigeons that is! They've been aroostin
in the rafters, causing a nuisance with messing and flapping
in the hotel grounds, and the hotel has had to put up some
mesh to stop the birdies resting on the ledgers. Eagle -eyed
as ever, I was walking down to the gift shop last week when
I spotted one of the porkly pigeons in distress, wings in
a total flap, caught in the mesh while three of his little
friends pecking madly trying to get him out. Shame. I had
a brainwave and used my super new mobile phone to call Mr
Loveday. I asked him to come instantly and bring the ladders.
Well do you know. He didn't the miserable so and so, I had
to go into the gift shop, buy a pen and call directory enquiries
for the RSPCA. They only had an answer machine so I called
the reception and the hotel. I didn't want to go in and
they might think I was one of those animal activists, especially
as we are regulars there.
The reception couldn't have been more helpful and apparently
this wasn't the first time that a pigeon or two had sought
refuge on the roof and sills at the hotel and they had been
having some problems. I was assured a member of maintenance
would get right onto it. I put on a warm coat and sat on
the wall opposite (outside the old folks place) and sure
enough out came a boiler suited maintenance man to free
the trapped bird. What a moment it was! Well I'm all for
giving them another star.
Stop Press: I was driving by on Sunday 12th January at
10.55 am and Ruby couldn't believe her eyes. Dubbed in foot
high paint on the front wall of the aforementioned hotel
was 'No Alysum (sic) here'. Well who could have done it.
Not the hotel, surely not a distinguished guest, not a local
respectable resident. No me thinks a pigeon!
Much love , Ruby
Is it just me or do there seem to be a lot of incidents
in Saltdean at the moment?
In the last week or two in my jaunts around the dean I've
seen a JCB minidigger in that drainage ditch they've been
digging on Saltdean vale, three men were trying in vain
to pull it out and a mummy size digger had to come to pull
out the mini. Then there was the camper van overturned on
the coast road, just at the top of Longridge Avenue, bedding
and clothes strewn all over the place, then there was the
stressed mother who reversed her mini metro through a garden
wall perimeter, completely smashing down 12 feet of brick
work! I'd love to have been a fly on the wall to witness
that one as well as those little domestics - I've seen the
sea rescue helicopters once or twice and talking of casting
your eyes heavenly, please tell me if Ruby Loveday is going
bonkers, but has anyone else seen those strange lights in
the sky above the Tye recently? I have seen two white lights
move very fast next to each other, much faster than a helicopter
or a plane. I've seen them twice and both times they were
only there for a couple of seconds and then gone. Oh well
- 'tis the season to see a bright light in the sky I suppose.
Congratulations to all the shop keepers in Saltdean. Every
one has made such an effort with the windows and if I was
giving out prizes the gold would go to the Martlets Charity
shop for 'ice queen'. What a revelation and all done with
donated goods and cellophane, I have it on good authority
that they have their own window dresser who is a retired
professional. I did congratulate them on the 'festive feast
for the eyes' however, I couldn't help overhearing one grumpy
customer mumble 'it's for buying not looking at'. There's
humbug to match Mr Loveday.
I was so hoping the new Chinese sit down restaurant would
be open Christmas. I've seen the decor - jade green and
pink - I do wish they would get a move on with it. Longridge
Avenue isn't the same since that Indian restaurant closed
down.
Updating you on my granddaughter Mandy's impending legal
action with a major high street retailer over her unnecessary
frisking, I am afraid talks have collapsed. Mandy's letter
of complaint was returned to her as the major retailer hasn't
paid for their freepost PO Box complaint address, and when
she phoned to complain she was told that a label stuck to
a child's shoe wouldn't have set off the alarm and she MUST
have had a security tag about her person. I ask you! It's
just not worth it. People say we are living in a culture
of compensation but my Mandy hasn't had much luck. I on
the other hand have!!!...But that is another story.
See you all at the Telscombe Fireworks on the 19th.
Much love and good will to
all who live in Saltdean,
Ruby
Oh shame on me, oh shame on me. I'm in one of those 'complaining
moods' and I'm in danger of turning into Saltdean's answer
to Victor Meldrew I must admit I as one of those 'angry
of Saltdean' residents that wrote into the Argus up in arms
about our badgers. Mr Loveday was not so in favour of my
having to returf the lawn every Spring because of unwanted
'padding about' but that is his department, and as the signs
on the top of Longridge Avenue say 'they were her before
us' although Mr Loveday is getting on a bit. I made my presence
felt at the 'badger Rally', as did many a local celebrity
and potential government electees. Yes we all love our stripy
friends - and didn't they sit up and take notice!!
But I must tell you that something terrible happened to
my granddaughter who shall remain nameless in the circumstances
but who lives in Lustrells Crescent. I will call her 'Mandy'
for the purpose of this column.' Mandy' likes to take her
custom in to town. I have always told her to shop locally,
we all know we can get everything we need within spitting
distance in saltdean, but she will insist on traipsing into
'Churchill Square' every Saturday laden with a massive pram
and my 2 lovely great-grandchildren. Well, you'll never
guess what happened to her - the poor love was accused of
shoplifting! Yes a granddaughter of mine caught! in a well
known ladies clothing store. Of course the whole thing was
a terrible misunderstanding as it turns out. Great-grandchild
number 1 had a reduced sticker under her trainer which set
off alarm bells, an assistant then approached 'Mandy' who
accused my granddaughter of having an unpaid for item about
her person, namely a belt. It was true that 'Mandy' had
tried a couple on for size, but I can assure you that she
discarded them back to the bargain palette from whence they
first came. She did indeed have a belt on, but one which
belonged to the current skirt that she was wearing about
her person that day! (Sorry to go into police speak) the
assistant then not happy that Mandy had not taken an item
with out paying for it started to sweep her hand down the
back of my granddaughters skirt (Mandy I do hope your waisters
were clean). Well of course they found nothing but my poor
granddaughter was mortified embarrassed and couldn't get
out of there quick enough. Of course when she got home I
swiftly put pen to paper on her behalf and I will keep you
informed as to the amount of compensation or recompense
we receive.
I was in that type of mod. Take no nonsense and give no
slack, so when Mr Loveday came home with our regular take-away
from Longridge Avenue and I thought it a little expensive
at £17 I wasted no time in telephoning in I took my
calculator and added up the cost of our meal - £13.
I'm sorry but wool will not be pulled over the eyes of this
customer, I'm not some young thing to be played with. The
take-away manager was soon begging apologies and told me
that Mr Loveday could please come in to collect the outstanding
£4.00. It just shows you what can be accomplished
by the power of the pen and a stern voice on the telephone.
I was 'chomping at the bit' to tell Mr Loveday to collect
his take-away blunder money 'but Mrs Loveday' he replied
'I told you it was £13 the meal. I never said it as
£17'. Needless to say Mr Loveday didn't turn up to
collect our phantom £4 and well done to the take-away
for agreeing that the customer is always right. I shall
be keeping my dialling finger on my halfpenny in future.
Yours as always, Ruby
The visual feast of the year takes place annually on the
second Saturday every August - the Peacehaven Horticultural
Association puts on it's yearly show. Not just flowers are
judged but vegetables, crafts, jams and flapjacks. Mr Loveday
and myself are friends of the association, mostly in the
hope of putting in a successful bid for produce at the end
of show auction.
It was a lovely show by anyone's standards. The dahlias
in particular caught my eye with 'blooms as big as human
heads'. I has assurances from the club treasurer that they
would be sold to the highest bidder after the proceedings
and that the usual bidding could rise to the lofty sum of
£1.50.
I stood armed with my fiver, willing and able to spend
the lot. Huge bunches of prize winning blooms were passing
through hands and being distributed amongst the lady bidders
(in quite an orderly fashion). It seemed only fair that
I should wait my turn and when I thought that everyone had
had a bid and got a bunch I started my bidding only to be
knocked down by a large lady standing near (who I couldn't
help noticing had already secured five bouquets in a co-op
trolley). 'Here Colin' she said ' take a pound for the next
lot' I couldn't believe it as he accepted and I threw her
one of my looks. She still went ahead with the same trick
again, with the next lot - a prize winning lot of crysanths.
Well that was the limit! I had to say something... 'Excuse
me' I chipped in 'I will give you five pounds fir these'
the cheek of it but the auctioneer wouldn't have it and
accepted the large lady's pound. Insider trading I call
it.
So I went away with only a sad bunch of herbs that no-one
wanted for 25p and some runny third prize jam.
Cant wait until next year
Yours, Ruby
A recent photo of Mr Loveday for your interest
Has anyone noticed that sign on a house at the top of Longridge
Avenue 'Lost Cockatiel' - well back to that in a minute.
I always take the opportunity of a homemade cake at the
Meridian Centre coffee morning, as well as going to the
supermarket it's a good opportunity to network with our
fellow community groups. Scones and bacon sarnies of of
a varying degree of quality, some of the best being supplied
by the Peacehaven Residents Association. I had a nibble
and a cuppa, and a quick nose thorough the Residents Association
newsletter with the usual collection of dogs muck and Portobello
stories and a small piece took my eye - 'Lost and Found
- an aviary bird has been found, please contact our Secretary
Jean'. I carefully highlighted the piece and made my way
to Longridge Avenue where I got Mr Loveday to push the newsletter
hopefully through the letterbox. Of course the missing bird
family had long given up hope of being reunited with the
little fellow but I felt sure that I had found the wandering
bid.
Soon after I got home the bird man called me to inform
me that an identification parade was taking place that night
and I would be the first to know if it had been a success.
My dialing finger was poised on the redial button and with
the Evening Argus number programmed in I was only hours
away from securing a front page special, oh what joy another
exclusive for Ruby Loveday.
Alas the bird in question was a parakeet not a Cockatiel
(if only those Peacehaven Residents had not been so vague
in their writings!)
Yours as always, Ruby
It's always a pleasure to bump into old friends so what
joy when I found my good old thespian girlfriend Dora Bryan
was to open the St Dunstan's Annual Fayre. She bought her
two Himalayan mountain dogs with her (they certainly left
their mark on the podium). Dora officially declared the
Fayre open and left the gathering stunned into silence when
she pronounced the Fayre open and then launched into a speech
about taking care of the animals. She was prompted into
remembering that this was indeed a do for the blind folks,
but she dug herself in even deeper by proclaiming that blindness
was a most unworthy cause and a serious matter. She did
correct herself however and then went onto entertain us
with a lovely poem about how children ought to be named
after they are grown up. Dora let us into the secret of
her success which she emphasized was CONCENTRATION.
Dora is currently to be seen in the Last of the Summer
Wine.
Much love, Ruby
First came the morning markets, then the travelling cinema,
but nothing in the history of Peacehaven has touched the
Meridian community hall with such talent and entertainment
as last weekends ballet spectacular 'The Selfish Giant'.
The Oscar Wilde story was performed by the dancers of the
Saltdean Academy of Dancing. There were two performances,
the matinee was particularly well attended by a mostly captive
audience of mums, sisters and weeping grandmas and reluctant
dads. The audience were surprised at the pure professionalism
and grace of the show that had all but the most hard hearted
non-relative in tears. I had come well prepared with my
roll of soft velvet toilet tissue and pillow from home as
the seating arrangements down the Meridian do incline one
to sweat and imprint a wet v shape when arising for the
interval. The cakes and refreshments were well worth waiting
for, and homemade - non of your Mr Kipling Fancies there.
The mums all outshone each other in there desire to help
in the kitchen and in the confusion I got charged twice
for my flapjack - not to worry - all in a good cause and
with tickets at £5 a head the Saltdean Academy must
have covered expenses nicely.
My only criticism of this event would be that we didn't
have the pleasure of seeing the lovely Miss Richards receive
her bouquet as there was some discrepancy over the curtain
pulling arrangements. We can only imagine the look of delight
on her face as she acknowledged her greatest success. The
little darlings were seen leaving by the back stage entrance
closely guarded by Miss Richards senior who was seen to
take firm control over costume retrieval.
What wonderful events will I be able to attend next week
I wonder?
Regards, Ruby
Hello all - Ruby here!
Just thought I'd keep you up to speed about my weekend
activities. On Saturday I went to the Gala Day down at the
Oval. Great fun was had by all and I loved the old cars.
My dear friend Doreen did point out however that during
the 'fun dog show' she was rather shocked to see all the
dogs in a circle nose to rear so to speak. My other friend
Lily was also quite disappointed that there was no race
for 'older ladies', and she did say that she reckoned she
could have shown a few of those mums a thing or two! The
speed at which she used to dodge the HP man, I believe she
could be right.
Anyway must sign off - I am baby-sitting for my daughter
tonight as she goes to Saltdean Primary's last PTA meeting
of the year - down the pub!
Yours always, Ruby
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